不科幻的外星人

时间：2022-10-29

　　Ning Hao has become famous since his masterpiece Crazy Stone were on screen in 2006. I’m not very clear about the rank or class of Chinese directors but when I think of Ning Hao there is always an impression that he must torture some unlucky actors to take an absurd and funny movie. And mostly Huang Bo is among those unlucky actors. That’s how he became successful.

　　自2006年《疯狂的石头》上映以来，宁浩就开始声名大噪。我不是很清楚中国导演的排名或者论资排辈，不过一想到宁浩，我总觉得又有倒霉的演员被他折磨，然后交出一部荒诞又爆笑的电影了。黄渤肯定经常充当这个倒霉蛋的角色，当然宁浩也是他的伯乐。

　　Personally I prefer Crazy Racer to the first one. If you know more about Ning Hao’s works than these two Crazy movies, you must know his No Man’s Land had to be held back for 4 years. As for the reason, you can search for some explanation about it. Of course he does some other jobs like producer, screenwriter and even cameo actor. There is a saying that you have to do something unwillingly to accumulate to make something you really want. So we can see three kinds of movie makers. A, the skillful commercial movies makers produce a lot of blockbusters to make big money, such as Wang Jing and Feng Xiaogang. B, the persistent literature movies makers bring up some famous but unpopular award-winning works, such as Lou Ye and Bi Gan. C, those who can balance commercial and art build up their own style, such as Zhang Yimou and Wang Jiawei. Ning Hao is close to C, I suppose.

　　其实比起石头，我个人更喜欢《疯狂的赛车》。当然如果你对宁浩的了解超出这两部电影，你一定还听说有一部口碑不错的《无人区》被雪藏了4年之久。个中原因，你可以在网上去搜索。除了导演，宁浩也会做做制品人，编剧，甚至客串演员。有这么一种说法，你总是需要去做一些你不愿意做的事儿，来积累资源最终能投入到你真正想做的事情里。所以我们大概能看见三种导演。第一种是那种高产的商业大片炮制者，他们经常能赚得钵满盆满，像王晶，还有冯小刚。第二种是苦苦坚持在文艺片的道路上，经常拿了些奖却缺少观众的叫好不叫座工作者，像娄烨，还有最近的毕赣。第三种是能够形成自己的风格，游刃有余在商业和文艺的平衡上的导演，比如张艺谋，以及王家卫。宁浩吧，我觉得有第三种的趋势。

　　Frankly speaking, I’m worried about the alien theme made by Ning Hao. What if he made an alien world full of dialect, rustic music and negative country culture? Unfortunately, I am right. So he did. Fortunately, this isn’t the part I have to worry about. After several minutes’ kind of posh scene of special effect, we’re naturally taken to the familiar land of dirt with the down-to-earth rock&roll. What a fantastic cast combined a lost and stubborn monkey man acted by Huang Bo and a sordid and unrealistic wine seller acted by Shen Teng! From the beginning to the part that the alien found back its tool, I rarely laughed. My wife asked me why I laughed out loud frequently when watching Pegasus but kept calm when watching Crazy Alien. I was thinking. After all, Ning Hao isn’t a A type director in my mind. What does he want to express? However, a friend asked me to recommend a movie for his family after I finished watching three, I didn’t hesitate to mention this one. Because you can achieve your goal easily if you just want to take your parents or children to have a relaxation. Another new punchline came after a set-up. Also, you won’t be disappointed if you want to have something to discuss. This isn’t another Guns and Roses which belongs to something unwilling, I’m afraid. He still tried to satirize such a few phenomena.

　　说实话，我挺担心他拍外星人题材的。万一他弄出个满是方言，土嗨音乐环绕，尽挑乡村文化中糟粕的一面的外星人咋办？不幸被我言中，这家伙真就这么干了。幸运的是，其实这并不是我需要担心的部分。开头几分钟假模假式的高大上特效场景后，观众就被那接地气的土味摇滚带进那个熟悉的宁浩电影宇宙了。黄渤扮演的一个失意的固执己见的耍猴人，沈腾扮演的一个市侩的好大喜功的酒贩子，这是什么神仙组合啊！不过从开头一直到外星人夺回自己的工具，我几乎都没怎么大笑。老婆问我，看《飞驰人生》的时候你都笑成那样，这个多好玩啊，你怎么都不笑。其实在看完三部贺岁档电影后，一个朋友让我推荐电影他和家人去看，我没怎么犹豫就推了这部《疯狂的外星人》。因为你只想和父母孩子一起好好放松下，大笑一场，这个是最佳选择。笑点密集，一个梗接着一个梗。同样，你想要收获点谈资，能引发点讨论，你也不会失望。宁浩还是在讽刺很多现象，放心，这绝不是又一部《黄金大劫案》，毕竟那个是积累来拍自己真正想拍的电影的。

　　I don’t think it necessary to emphasize the funny part of the movie with these two leading actors. Sometimes you may want to laugh at the sight of their faces. Some impressive parts are as following. After basic tricks, being trained to master Kungfu and serve people wine is the priority. Paying back in the completely same way makes the alien pleased but it’s not so pleased as drinking wine. And even during drinking the seller were still trying doing business and it’s not just a strategy. Temporary Residential Permit isn’t out of date and the person who devoted it comes from Guns and Roses. Paying tribute to Hidden Man, King Kong, Wolf Warriors and King of Comedy amused me a lot. I have to admit I don’t enjoy the part to show how dumb Americans are at first. In the end, I can accept it. It’s logical not like ridiculous anti-Japan drama. To me the surprising setting is about a theme park like Window of the World beyond foreigner’s imagination. That’s hilarious to use a bunch of fools to highlight an action looks wise.

　　其实我觉得没必要去多聊这部电影的喜剧效果，毕竟有这么两个大神参演。以下简单说几点印象深刻的。在基础的杂耍训练后，外星人被优先训练中国功夫和给客人倒酒，真特色。后来外星人以牙还牙的时候，它很满意，不过没有喝酒那么满意，真特色。这个市侩贩子，喝酒的时候还不忘做生意，而且是认真的做，真特色。暂住证的梗还是不过时呀，顺便说一下，贡献这个梗的客串演员雷佳音就是从《黄金大劫案》里出来的，看见没，积累。对《邪不压正》《战狼》《金刚》和《喜剧之王》的致敬梗效果还不错。说实话，刚开始我不笑也是对美国人的嘲弄我有点不适应。不过后来就明白了，还是合乎逻辑的，不是手撕鬼子那种丑化。对我个人而言，最好玩的是一个类似世界之窗这样的主题公园，是不是外国压根就没有想到过啊？太好笑了，还要先用一群傻子，来凸显这么一个看似高明的分析。

　　As for the sarcastic effect, there’s already a lot of analysis. I have some theories too. The alien’s experience reminded me of an old cartoon in 1995 named A Mystery of Strange Eggs. It told a simple story about two eggs from space. The alien from an egg became kind because persons who found it treated it nice and the other alien damage everything because persons who found it tried to destroy it. The theme song was very brainwashing. Well, people are meant to be afraid of something we know little about. Second, a so-called advanced being even can’t get rid of a rope when it fell into a rusty world. No matter how big a person you are, you can’t make it if you don’t comply with the current situation. A billionaire probably can’t get through a provincial highway during Spring Festival himself. So we can witness an alien to be made a servant. Third, we often hear some words like don’t look down up on yourself, but I think the opposite is more harmful to your health, which connects to a disgusting scene same as eating shits. Next, the alien looks like a monkey and it transformed into a real monkey to fight later. Speaking of monkey, someone has a new movie about Monkey King the next year and, well, this part might be prohibited, forget about it. Last but not least, when you are used to something so much that it’s already become a habit, you can never get rid of it. Especially being dominating and, well, this one is more likely to be prohibited, so be it.

　　现在来说说讽刺的部分，其实网上已经有版本的了，我也有一点点自己的理解。这个外星人的经历让我想起1995年的一部国产动画片，名叫《怪蛋之谜》。故事特别简单，两个天外来蛋，一个得到发现者的细心呵护，孵化出的外星人很岁月静好；一个被发现者各种破坏，出来的自然是个混世魔王。这个主题曲非常洗脑。没办法，人总是对未知的充满本能的恐惧。然后呢，一个高等生物沦落到一个低等规则的世界时，连一根普通的绳子都摆脱不了。所以呢，不管你是什么大人物，不能因地制宜的话可能都会寸步难行。正值春运，一个亿万富翁只身走在省道上，估计也可能被困。所以这可怜的家伙甚至当了几天仆人，还有王法嘛？第三，我们常说别妄自菲薄，其实我觉得自命不凡往往更要命，太出风头了对健康有害。这里涉及一个非常恶心的场景，基本就和吃翔一回事了。另外呢，外星人的造型非常像猴子，后来干脆就还附身到真猴子上。说起猴子，明年有一部中美合拍片，美猴王文体两开花，哦，这段不能说，那跳过吧。最后很重要的一点，如果你对某件事已经形成习惯了，尤其是被管控，你可能很难改掉，哦，这个也不能说，那就这样吧。

　　A little tired, this is a successful experiment to put these two together. Xu Zheng is more like a cameo appearance in the end but why so much appreciation is given to him? You should know a technology named Motion Capture. A lot of fantasy movies use this to shape special characters, such as a dragon or a giant. Xu Zheng is the alien.

　　有点累了，这两个活宝放在一起还是很成功的。本想说流水的基友，铁打的黄渤，发现好像是片尾客串的徐峥被频繁致谢。你一定知道“动作捕捉”这个技术吧，很多奇幻电影中的龙啊，巨人啊，什么的都是需要演员来用这个技术演绎的，很辛苦。徐峥就是这个疯狂的外星人。

　　Plus, John Stockton is a legendary and respectful NBA player. Why does our director hate him?